Here’s a quick exercise: Name three things that you avoid doing. It could be speaking in public, meeting new people, or going to the gym. Chances are that you have gotten good at avoiding these activities.
We like to organize our lives around things that make us feel comfortable rather than uncomfortable. Comfortable places make us feel safe and stress-free. But they may also be devoid of possibilities. So, while there is nothing wrong with being comfortable, you need to be mindful that your comfortable places may, in fact, be your emotional hiding places.
An emotional hiding place can be conceived of as a psychological refuge. Often taking the form of mental or emotional habits, we retreat into routines, familiar environments, and predictable choices because they help us manage uncertainty. These refuges can be helpful when we need rest or stability, but they may also prevent us from confronting challenges that help us grow.
Psychologists note that personal growth typically occurs just beyond our comfort zone. Comfortable environments reduce anxiety but encourage avoidance of experimentation and risk-taking. When comfort becomes the goal, it may limit curiosity, creativity, and new experiences that could help us grow.
Ask yourself, is your comfort place your hiding place? The chances are good that life outside your comfort zone can surprise you positively. Here are 9 tips to help you step out into that scary unknown.
Think back to the exercise we started with. By understanding what makes us nervous, we can work towards building a positive attitude about those things. For example, if you avoid people, then you will not experience a sense of community. While leaving the comfort zone will come with some associated pain, the upside is that you could make new friends.
We need to nurture the understanding that not all pain needs to be avoided. From among all the things that you avoid, think of those that are the least scary and the potential benefits that could result. Yes, these are things that make you nervous, but you have some level of confidence that you can manage the pain they cause. If the pain is tolerable, you have more incentive to live through discomfort or fear to reap the potential gains on the other side.
When you decide to move outside your comfort zone, remember to take it slowly. Ironically, we may sometimes be too motivated and take on too much, only to feel so much discomfort that we get discouraged. In such a case, you are likely to react by going further into your comfort zone. So, when you’re expanding your boundaries, do it little by little so you can experience some success that will further motivate you.
When we take things slowly and put ourselves in slightly uncomfortable situations, we learn to face our fears. The idea is to take small, controlled risks to get better at dealing with change. Stepping out of your comfort zone will stress you a little, but it can help you perform better and boost your enthusiasm.
We support our comfort zones by maintaining a routine environment. Within this routine environment, routine tasks yield routine levels of performance. For example, think of the road you usually take to go to the supermarket. A small exercise could be to challenge yourself to take a new route, or even to go to a different store. Other examples are:
Finding new ways to do these everyday things a little differently makes it easier to handle small levels of discomfort. Accomplishing these minor challenges can even feel exciting and rewarding. Therefore, we learn that, despite being a little difficult, things can still be done.
The phrase ‘Be positive’ gets thrown around easily, but what does it really mean? It isn’t about ignoring the negative aspects of a situation. Rather, it suggests that one has weighed both the positive and negative aspects and consciously chosen to accentuate the positive.
For example, if you feel uncomfortable in a situation, like public speaking, adopting the attitude that this negative feeling is common can help put it in perspective. Human nature often focuses on the negatives. This may be a result of the survival-of-the-fittest behavior from our distant past. It may have helped our ancestors stay alive, but in the modern world, negative attitudes can lead to depression-like symptoms and other mental and emotional ailments.
Having a positive mindset means you are not deterred from a course of action by thoughts of possible negative outcomes. If you accept them as part of the quest for achieving positive outcomes, then you’re expressing a positive mindset. zone. Being positive means facing negative thoughts when we step out of our comfort zone and understanding that it is all a part of the growth process.
Another constructive way to step outside your comfort zone is to consider talking to someone very different from you. It could be someone from a different generation, with a differing political point of view, or from another part of the world. By listening to their perspectives, you will grow in understanding and, hopefully, empathy. As a result, your ideas, attitudes, and long-held beliefs may evolve. For example, talk to someone much younger than you. You may learn about different points of view on concepts such as owning a car or other spending priorities. These different ideas and perspectives will help you broaden your own opinions on the world and develop deeper wisdom and understanding of life.
Planning to get out of your comfort zone might seem a little counterintuitive. Isn’t it just a matter of making up your mind and then just doing it? That might work in some cases, but planning will reduce a lot of stress and possibly set you up for further improvements.
Planning to do something outside your comfort zone helps you mentally prepare yourself for the unknown. In addition, when planning, you may find that it is not as scary or uncomfortable as you thought. For example, the idea of going bungee jumping might spike your nerves, but during your research, you may learn that bungee jumping is actually quite safe when done properly.
Make the most of these tips and explore the outskirts of your comfort zone. Remember that being uncomfortable, slightly stressed, and afraid is part of the process. So, take it slow but keep at it. You will be surprised to find what life has in store beyond the bounds of your comfort zone.
Give yourself room to try something new. A little financial cushion can make new experiences easier to say yes to.